Schools Ban Swings Because Everything Is Dangerous

Schools in Richland, Washington, are
phasing out playground swing sets. According to KEPRTV:

Swings are blamed for the most injuries of any play
equipment.

Richland School District already removed them from some campuses
and will phase them out of the rest.

“As schools get modernized or renovated or as we’re doing work
on the playground equipment, we’ll take out the swings, it’s just
really a safety issue, swings have been determined to be the most
unsafe of all the playground equipment on a playground,” said
Richland School District’s Steve Aagard.

Before your head explodes, remember that the school district has
some very compelling argu… oh wait. It doesn’t. Of
course some kids get hit by swings and of course
there are some injuries—even awful ones—but that does not
automatically mean we must ban swings. If it did, we would have to
ban all solid food because some kids choke. We would have to ban
all bikes because some kids wipe out and hurt themselves. We
would have to chop down all of America’s trees as well—at least in
parks and playgrounds—because some children climb them and fall
off.

The school district
says “pressure from insurance companies over the liability is part
of the issue.” The only sane thing to do is push back. Heck, most
insurance companies would like to keep children seatbelted to their
chairs and strapped to blood pressure cuffs, just in case of any
heart conditions. Can’t be too careful!

In any case, schools that eviscerate their playgrounds are
actually putting their kids at risk—just a different kind of
risk. Think obesity. Depression. Diabetes. One thing we know
that combats all three is playing outdoors: an activity that has
included swinging since Tarzan’s time.

Insurance agents look at life through the lens of risk. Nothing
looks safe to them. But there’s no reason for the rest of us to
think like Allstate. Citizens of Richland: Unite! You’ve nothing to
lose but your chains (with swings at the bottom of them).