Teen Arrested, Suspended for Shooting a Dinosaur (In a Story He Wrote)

Now that summer is over and school is starting up
again, it’s time for the torrent of ridiculous “zero tolerance”
suspensions and arrests to resume.

Summerville High School in Summerville, South Carolina, is
wasting no time: A 16-year-old student was arrested and
suspended for writing a story in which he used a gun to
kill a dinosaur. The student, Alex Stone, was assigned by a teacher
to write a story about himself. Stone chose to embellish his story
with obviously fictional details, like dinosaurs. But the teacher
saw the word “gun” and the rest is history,
according to NBC-12:

Stone said in his “status” he wrote a fictional story that
involved the words “gun” and “take care of business.”

“I killed my neighbor’s pet dinosaur, and, then, in the next
status I said I bought the gun to take care of the business,” Stone
said.

Stone says his statements were taken completely out of
context.

“I could understand if they made him re-write it because he did
have “gun” in it. But a pet dinosaur?” said Alex’s mother Karen
Gray.”I mean first of all, we don’t have dinosaurs anymore. Second
of all, he’s not even old enough to buy a gun.”

Investigators say the teacher contacted school officials after
seeing the message containing the words “gun” and “take care of
business,” and police were then notified on Tuesday.

The police arrested Stone and charged him with disorderly
conduct. He was also suspended from school for a week.

And just like that, the
pop-tart gun suspension has been dethroned as the most absurd
zero tolerance story. And it’s not even September yet! Well done,
Summerville. 

Readers, welcome back to public school.