South Dakota Lawmaker Begs Docs to ‘Come Out’ About Dangers of ‘Gay Lifestyle’

You can tell South Dakota Rep.
Steve Hickey (R-Sioux Falls) is quite proud of the analogy he made
in a recent anti–anal sex screed, titled “A One Way Alley for the
Garbage Truck.” Edgy! After submitting the letter to the Argus
Leader, South Dakota’s largest newspaper,
Hickey also posted it to Facebook. “We’ll see if they reprint
it,” he wrote. “Kristen hates the title. You probably will too.
Doubt they use it…”

And yet, clearly, he found the garbage truck comparison just too
good to pass up. He’s also sure that more doctors would speak out
against homosexuality if they didn’t feel “silenced and
intimidated.” 

“Certainly there are board-certified doctors in our state who
will attest to what seems self-evident to so many: gay sex is not
good for the body or mind. Pardon a crude comparison but regarding
men with men, we are talking about a one-way alley meant only for
the garbage truck to go down. Frankly, I’d question the judgment of
doctor who says it’s all fine.”

Frankly, I’d question the judgment of a lawmaker who refers to
his anus as an alley and his poop as a garbage truck. But different
strokes… 

Hickey goes on to tell South Dakota doctors that it’s time “to
come out of the closet and give your professional opinion on this
matter like you capably and responsibly do on all the others.” This
belies perhaps the most amazing thing about Hickey’s letter—he is
utterly convinced that doctors must agree with him, and the only
reason we hear that “eating at McDonald’s will kill us but the gay
lifestyle” won’t is because no one’s properly encouraged them in a
strongly worded letter-to-the-editor yet.

“Truth be told it seems self-evident the list of side effects
would read far longer than anything we hear on a Cialis
commercial,” writes Hickey. Translation: Come on, guys, butt
sex has to be more dangerous than my boner meds! 

After a few paragraphs lamenting the existence of transgender
teens, Hickey concludes by “issu(ing) a call to the medical and
psychological communities and associations to weigh in publicly and
timely on the matter of homosexuality and the human body, psyche
and family, particular kids.” Here,

Rep. Hickey, LMGTFY…