Helicopter Parents Fight Sanity, Democracy in ‘Strangers in the Schools’

Greendale, Wisconsin (population: 14,000) is
considering a referendum that would prohibit the town from
continuing its age-old practice of putting polling locations inside
schools. The reasoning seems to be this: If voters come into a
school, then they could shoot the children.

Yes, it’s a ridiculous worry. So ridiculous, in fact, that I
actually wrote a song mocking this fear. (Go
here to listen to “Strangers in the
Schools,” set to the tune of “Strangers in the Night” by
Frank Sinatra.)

But even more ridiculous than the idea that voters in schools
pose some extraordinary threat to kids is what a group of Greendale
parents and teachers want to do about it. Worried that the
referendum might not pass if  too many non-parents get a
chance to vote on it, they actually don’t want the broader public
to vote at all. According to Adam
Tobias in The
Wisconsin Reporter:

Some parents and educators who spoke at a Greendale
Village Board of Trustees meeting earlier this month
indicated the referendum should not be placed on the ballot because
taxpaying citizens who do not have children may tip the scales.

“I think there is going to be too many non-stakeholders that
would vote during that referendum,” said Jason Patzfahl…“Some
stakes are higher than others. I think having two of my kids in the
elementary schools makes me a little bit more of a higher
stakeholder.”

In other words, because non-parents may be more rational about a
threat that has never materialized, as far as I can tell—namely,
adults in a school on Election Day harming students—they should be
deprived the chance to vote.

I suppose the thinking is that only parents care whether kids
live or die. What a lovely town this Greendale sounds like!