Well that's embarrassing…
Meet 'Conservative' Mike Webb – he is running for U.S. Congress in Virginia's 8th District, and he would appreciate your vote.
He would also appreciate, as Gawker reports, judging from a screenshot uploaded to his Facebook page earlier today, a little alone time with the pages “IVONE SEXY AMATEUR” and “LAYLA RIVERA TIGHT BOOTY.”
For over a day now the following screen-grab – showing his investigation into a Human Resources company – has been posted to his campaign page… the only thing is – the 2 far left tabs – based on our deep and lengthy research are pornographic movie sites…
Ok – so we have all done it – come on. But the story gets better, as Webb then offers the following explanation for his surfing habits (please remove all fluids from your mouth before reading)…
Curious by nature, I wanted to test the suggestion that somehow, lurking out in the pornographic world there is some evil operator waiting for the one in a gazillion chance that a candidate for federal office would go to that particular website and thereby be infected with a virus that would cause his or her FEC data file to crash the FECfile application each time that it was loaded on the day of the filing deadline, as well as impact other critical campaign systems.
Well, the Geek Squad techs testified to me, after servicing thousands of computers at the Baileys Crossroads location that they had never seen any computer using their signature virus protection for the time period to acquire over 4800 viruses, 300 of which would require re-installation of the operating system. We are currently awaiting their attempt at recovery of files on that machine accidentally deleted when they failed to backup files before re-installation, a scenario about which Matthew Wavro speculated openly to me before we were informed by the Geek Squad that that had indeed occurred….
But, now let me tell you the results of my empirical inquiry that introduced me to Layla and Ivone. Around Powerball lottery time, January 9, 2016, I calculated the odds that my friend Rev. Howard John Wesley and I working independently arrived at the same prayer plan, and I was able to determine that there was about a one in a billion chance that that could have occurred in the way that it did. (http://ift.tt/1RcIRuh). Well, as much as folks like Duffy Taylor want to hope that the Devil is waiting for Christian candidates on a particular pornographic website to infect his or her FEC data file is even more improbable than my Paul and Silas story, and I know that Duffy Taylor is not a man of faith belief; so, I don’t know how he empirically arrives at his conclusion. I couldn’t see the probability or possibility without a RAND computer.
But, that is the news that will never be printed, but no matter. We found a few more “silent majority” worms today, but we also picked up a few more of the faithful. So, not a bad day, at all.
As one witty Twitter-er quipped… What's more embarrassing, the porn tabs or the fact that he is using Yahoo as a search engine? I’m going to go with Yahoo on this one.
via http://ift.tt/203XeXE Tyler Durden